Heart to Heart

October 7, 2008


Originally uploaded by Sutanto


I need to lose weight, but I am having a hard time sticking to any plan. I have a lot of books and exercise DVDs and a good understanding of what works for me, but that is not the problem. The problem is that I feel like it is easier to give in the temptation that fast food and cheap food offers. I excuse my poor choices by saying that it would be so much easier to lose weight if I lived by myself and did not have a family to feed. It is hard to spend four hours preparing a very healthy meal that will fill us all and to see them frown up and say thank you for cooking as they scurry to the kitchen to dump their leftovers in the trashcan. Nobody looks disappointed when I cook macaroni and cheese with fried chicken, nobody is complaining that they are full when I bring home Burger King. I watched the fast food documentary that made me believe that all of those restaurants were going to kill me, but still I had White Castles for dinner.

Part of the problem I have is that perfection’s voice inside telling me if you can’t do it right then don’t do it at all. When I was younger it was easy for me to make life style changes; I once gave up meat for three months on a whim. Now that I’m older I have so many life and death motivations to make permanent changes, but it seems like the more reason I have to change the harder it becomes. I just don’t know how to make major diet changes without my family eating the same way; I know how not to buy Doritos but I don’t know how to avoid eating them when they are in the house and I don’t have anything else prepared. My family consists of my 32 year old husband who was hospitalized this year for having an artery with a 95% blockage, and a his 17 years old sister who we have been caring for since their mother died of a heart attack almost 3 years ago (did I mention my husband’s father having at least two open heart surgeries already). It have tried to have heart to heart with my family and tell them that no longer will we by fatty and sugary foods and I buy the super healthy food my husband worries about the grocery bill and him and sis, end up eating more fast food. When I try to cook healthy for myself and make them what they want I feel guilty and tempted all the time. I’m not sure what the solution is.

What I want to do is follow this anti-aging diet plan that limits your calories but provides you with very nutritious foods so that your body gets everything it needs and your appetite is satisfied. Originally I worked it out with my husband that I he would give me the full grocery budget and I would buy groceries based off of the plan and slowly implement it for the whole family. Since then I have gotten discouraged by the lack of enthusiasm and feeling overwhelmed at learning a new lifestyle while trying to force it upon everyone else; while I’ve done that I’ve noticed bills that are not getting paid because of the new grocery bill.

Out of frustration and need to take a cooking break I came up with a new plan. I proposed tonight that we all split the grocery bill, menu planning and cooking up. We will each get money for grocery and, two days each week, we are responsible for cooking dinner (cooking is optional for my husband since he is the only one with a job). I was a little worried that my family would not go for it but they all said that it was a good idea.

I’ve gotten a lot of good advice along the way but what do you have to say? Any suggestion will be greatly appreciated.